Self-Care has been a huge topic for our generation. It has been said that Millenials may be a bit obsessed with self-care. A large explanation for that may be the overwhelming access to knowledge available to us. We are aware of EVERYTHING. That much awareness is powerful and a lot of the times overwhelming. Damaging. On the other hand, the introduction of things like social media throughout the millennial generation has increased understanding of mental illnesses and decreased the stigma. There is always a little bad in the good and a little good in the bad.
Anyway, what does that mean for us? SELF-CARE = NECESSARY. And after my “Is your man cheating?” post (see here) my next goal was to talk about healing. I want to give tips on self-care after a breakup. Breakups can be traumatic. It may take months to fully process and then years to get over it. The following are some things I would do immediately after a bad breakup.
1. UNFOLLOW THAT MAN. Or woman. Whatever. Do not keep following each other on social media. Let’s be real, we stalk each other in this generation. Like social media is causal stalking. And how does it feel to be broken up with someone and still know what they do EVERY FUCKIN DAY? Weird. Unfollow.
2. Do not talk to each other for 30 days. I know it hurts because yall talk every day. I know you just want to check to see if they are ok. Challenge yourself. Break your old routine. You need to see what its like to not always be connected to this person. You don’t have to block each other. Just make a commitment to the decision you made to break up. After the 30-day mark do a self-check and see if you want to speak to this person. You may be surprised at how you feel.
3. Spend time with your closest friends. I don’t care if you sit at home and cry over ice cream, or go out to the club and have promoters pouring Henny down your throat. Or (personal fav) you Sex and the City with it by substituting your Baecation for a girls trip. Get with them and do something you enjoy and vent about your shit. You need it.
4. Spend some time alone too. Doing your favorite alone time activity. For me, it’s writing, binging on Netflix, and bubble baths. In this time you can reflect the most and really pinpoint how you feel about what you just experienced.
5. Try one new thing that scares you. A lot of girls cut their hair but it could be anything! Try a burlesque dance class for the first time. Go to an open mic night and sing out loud, in front of everybody. Have a personal photo shoot and actually post the photos. My least favorite but I will put it out there: Go skydiving! When you’re engaged in something that scares you can forget about some of the pain for a while.
6. Have an orgasm. A good one. You can go out and have a one-night stand, or if you happen to have a no strings attached sort of lover in your life that’s cool too. If you don’t live your life as free, get a toy. Orgasms are a good thing. With or without that person!
Now is the time to show yourself an incredible amount of love. You deserve it!